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Rejection is a peculiar thing. It is omnipresent in the legal profession yet rarely acknowledged. In the grand tradition of the Bar, where one must exude confidence, unflappability and a certain inscrutable gravitas, admitting to having suffered rejection is, to many, tantamount to admitting weakness. This, of course, is nonsense. But it is nonsense we have all, at some point, ‘subscribed’ to.
Applications for judicial posts, silk, tenancy or other professional advancements are intricate, laborious and often unduly protracted affairs. They demand introspection, endless iterations of drafting and an ability to contort one’s achievements into whatever shape the application form, competencies and framework requires. And after all that, rejection can arrive with a dull thud. No trumpets sound; no mourners weep. Just a sterile email or, if one is lucky, a letter offering vague encouragement before the final kick in the teeth.
Yet despite this shared experience, we barristers often suffer our setbacks in private. The expectation to maintain an air of perpetual success is not only unrealistic but deeply unhelpful. The result? A profession replete with individuals shouldering silent disappointments, each feeling as though they alone have stumbled while their peers glide effortlessly ahead.
Rejection, whether professional or personal, is painful because it strikes at the very core of our self-worth. Psychologists have likened rejection to physical pain and brain scans show that social rejection activates the same regions of the brain as a physical injury. In short, that sting you feel upon receiving a ‘regret to inform you’ email is not mere melodrama; it is a neurological reality.
At the Bar, where success is often equated with one’s very identity, rejection can feel like an indictment not just of one’s application but of one’s entire career. The long-winded nature of judicial and silk applications exacerbates this. It is one thing to be turned down for something completed in a single afternoon. It is quite another to dedicate months to a process, interrogating every facet of one’s professional life, only to be met with a resounding ‘no’. The time, the energy, the anticipation – all evaporate in an instant.
And yet, rejection is not the enemy. It is, in its own twisted way, one of the best professional teachers we have.
It is an unwelcome truth, but failure builds resilience in a way that unbroken success never could. The most accomplished people in any field have invariably faced rejection. The difference between those who succeed and those who do not is not the absence of failure but the ability to persist in the face of it.
Consider the judiciary. Many of the most respected judges did not succeed on their first attempt. The same is true for silk and tenancy. The irony is that those who have faced rejection often make better candidates when they reapply. Having undergone the process once, they return with a sharper understanding of its nuances, a stronger narrative and, crucially, a more robust sense of self.
Moreover, rejection forces adaptation. It compels us to reassess, refine, and, if necessary, recalibrate our ambitions. Sometimes, what feels like a devastating setback is, in hindsight, a crucial course correction. The missed opportunity forces one to acquire additional experience, sharpen advocacy skills or broaden one’s practice, ultimately leading to an outcome superior to what was originally sought.
Normalise it! The first and most critical step is to recognise that rejection is not an aberration. It is, in fact, the norm. The myth of effortless success is precisely that, a myth. Behind every judge, every silk, every successful applicant, there is almost certainly at least one rejection story (often many more than one). You are not alone, and you are certainly not inadequate.
Deconstruct the rejection. Not all rejections are equal. Some are arbitrary, others are instructive. If feedback is offered, take it seriously but not personally. Seek to understand why your application was unsuccessful. Was it a matter of experience? Was your advocacy style not sufficiently demonstrated? Were your examples too generic? If feedback is not provided, consider seeking informal guidance from those who have successfully navigated the process.
Not this time? Oh, you mean ‘not yet!’ How you internalise rejection matters. If you view it as confirmation of your unworthiness, it will become a self-fulfilling prophecy. Instead, reframe it as a temporary setback and a learning opportunity. You were not ‘rejected’; you were ‘not selected this time’. It is a small linguistic shift, but it can make a considerable psychological difference.
Maintain perspective. The rejection of an application is not the rejection of a career. You are still the same barrister you were before the rejection capable, intelligent, and skilled. Remember that there are factors beyond your control. The selection process is not always fair, nor is it always reflective of true merit. Sometimes, other considerations political, demographic, or entirely inscrutable play a role. Do not let an unsuccessful application define you.
Cry today, conquer tomorrow. My yoga teacher once said, allow yourself to feel disappointment when you have not been able to get into the Asna (position) you want to. Suppressing it entirely is neither healthy nor sustainable. Set a time limit a day, a weekend, to feel thoroughly sorry for yourself. Then, move on. Self-pity is a luxury barristers cannot afford for long. Otherwise it will impact your confidence in your day to day cases and this will effect your diary. Again the self-fulfilling prophecy.
Channel the energy productively. Use rejection as motivation. Identify areas for improvement and set a plan in motion. Whether it is broadening your practice/experience, strengthening your advocacy, or enhancing your professional visibility, take proactive steps towards making yourself an even stronger candidate for the next attempt.
Reapplying: because stubbornness is a virtue. Once the initial sting subsides, reapply. This seems obvious, but many barristers allow rejection to dissuade them from ever applying again. This is a mistake. The statistics alone dictate that persistence pays off. Those who succeed are, more often than not, those who simply refused to stop trying.
Surround yourself with a supportive network. Speak to those who have been through it. Seek mentors who can provide both practical and psychological support. The legal profession, for all its stiff upper lips, contains many who are willing to share their own experiences, if only asked.
Above all, maintain the long view. A setback today is not the end of the road. It is merely a diversion, perhaps even a necessary one. The profession is replete with examples of barristers who faced repeated rejections before ultimately achieving their goals. If anything, these individuals emerge stronger, more resilient, and better prepared for the responsibilities that await them.
Rejection is unpleasant, but it is also inevitable. The legal profession, for all its prestige, is not immune to the fundamental realities of human endeavour. Setbacks are not failures; they are merely stepping stones to eventual success.
When faced with the rejection of a role, it is worth remembering the Law of Conservation of Energy – the principle that energy cannot be destroyed, only transformed. Instead of allowing disappointment or frustration to consume us, we should redirect that excess energy into something constructive. Just as Albert Einstein demonstrated that mass and energy are interchangeable, so too can we convert the emotional energy of rejection into professional growth, social engagement, or personal development. Channel that energy into refining your skills, expanding your network, or even pursuing a long-neglected passion. Whether it is enhancing your practice, contributing to a cause, or strengthening personal relationships, the key is not to let rejection deplete you but to let it propel you forward. Or even write an article about it to show others they are not alone!
So, the next time an email arrives bearing less-than-ideal news, take a deep breath, allow yourself a moment of irritation (or an entire evening with a stiff drink) and then remember rejection is not the end. It is merely another chapter in the long, often frustrating, but ultimately rewarding story of a career at the Bar.
I end with saying if it were easy, everyone would be doing it, and if that’s the case it wouldn’t be worth doing in the first place.
Sources of support
The Bar Council offers a mentoring scheme to those interested in silk or judicial appointments.
The Mental Health & Wellbeing at the Bar website is full of useful resources and sources of support for barristers’ psychological health . There is also a 24/7 confidential helpline (tel: 0800 169 2040) for self-employed barristers with a practising certificate as well as members of the IBC and LPMA.
LawCare offers peer-to-peer support for anyone in or associated with the legal community. Call: 0800 279 6888 (Mon to Fri, 9am to 5pm except bank holidays).
The Samaritans can be contacted 24 hours a day, 365 days a year on tel: 116 123, or email: jo@samaritans.org.
International helplines can be found at: befrienders.org.
Rejection is a peculiar thing. It is omnipresent in the legal profession yet rarely acknowledged. In the grand tradition of the Bar, where one must exude confidence, unflappability and a certain inscrutable gravitas, admitting to having suffered rejection is, to many, tantamount to admitting weakness. This, of course, is nonsense. But it is nonsense we have all, at some point, ‘subscribed’ to.
Applications for judicial posts, silk, tenancy or other professional advancements are intricate, laborious and often unduly protracted affairs. They demand introspection, endless iterations of drafting and an ability to contort one’s achievements into whatever shape the application form, competencies and framework requires. And after all that, rejection can arrive with a dull thud. No trumpets sound; no mourners weep. Just a sterile email or, if one is lucky, a letter offering vague encouragement before the final kick in the teeth.
Yet despite this shared experience, we barristers often suffer our setbacks in private. The expectation to maintain an air of perpetual success is not only unrealistic but deeply unhelpful. The result? A profession replete with individuals shouldering silent disappointments, each feeling as though they alone have stumbled while their peers glide effortlessly ahead.
Rejection, whether professional or personal, is painful because it strikes at the very core of our self-worth. Psychologists have likened rejection to physical pain and brain scans show that social rejection activates the same regions of the brain as a physical injury. In short, that sting you feel upon receiving a ‘regret to inform you’ email is not mere melodrama; it is a neurological reality.
At the Bar, where success is often equated with one’s very identity, rejection can feel like an indictment not just of one’s application but of one’s entire career. The long-winded nature of judicial and silk applications exacerbates this. It is one thing to be turned down for something completed in a single afternoon. It is quite another to dedicate months to a process, interrogating every facet of one’s professional life, only to be met with a resounding ‘no’. The time, the energy, the anticipation – all evaporate in an instant.
And yet, rejection is not the enemy. It is, in its own twisted way, one of the best professional teachers we have.
It is an unwelcome truth, but failure builds resilience in a way that unbroken success never could. The most accomplished people in any field have invariably faced rejection. The difference between those who succeed and those who do not is not the absence of failure but the ability to persist in the face of it.
Consider the judiciary. Many of the most respected judges did not succeed on their first attempt. The same is true for silk and tenancy. The irony is that those who have faced rejection often make better candidates when they reapply. Having undergone the process once, they return with a sharper understanding of its nuances, a stronger narrative and, crucially, a more robust sense of self.
Moreover, rejection forces adaptation. It compels us to reassess, refine, and, if necessary, recalibrate our ambitions. Sometimes, what feels like a devastating setback is, in hindsight, a crucial course correction. The missed opportunity forces one to acquire additional experience, sharpen advocacy skills or broaden one’s practice, ultimately leading to an outcome superior to what was originally sought.
Normalise it! The first and most critical step is to recognise that rejection is not an aberration. It is, in fact, the norm. The myth of effortless success is precisely that, a myth. Behind every judge, every silk, every successful applicant, there is almost certainly at least one rejection story (often many more than one). You are not alone, and you are certainly not inadequate.
Deconstruct the rejection. Not all rejections are equal. Some are arbitrary, others are instructive. If feedback is offered, take it seriously but not personally. Seek to understand why your application was unsuccessful. Was it a matter of experience? Was your advocacy style not sufficiently demonstrated? Were your examples too generic? If feedback is not provided, consider seeking informal guidance from those who have successfully navigated the process.
Not this time? Oh, you mean ‘not yet!’ How you internalise rejection matters. If you view it as confirmation of your unworthiness, it will become a self-fulfilling prophecy. Instead, reframe it as a temporary setback and a learning opportunity. You were not ‘rejected’; you were ‘not selected this time’. It is a small linguistic shift, but it can make a considerable psychological difference.
Maintain perspective. The rejection of an application is not the rejection of a career. You are still the same barrister you were before the rejection capable, intelligent, and skilled. Remember that there are factors beyond your control. The selection process is not always fair, nor is it always reflective of true merit. Sometimes, other considerations political, demographic, or entirely inscrutable play a role. Do not let an unsuccessful application define you.
Cry today, conquer tomorrow. My yoga teacher once said, allow yourself to feel disappointment when you have not been able to get into the Asna (position) you want to. Suppressing it entirely is neither healthy nor sustainable. Set a time limit a day, a weekend, to feel thoroughly sorry for yourself. Then, move on. Self-pity is a luxury barristers cannot afford for long. Otherwise it will impact your confidence in your day to day cases and this will effect your diary. Again the self-fulfilling prophecy.
Channel the energy productively. Use rejection as motivation. Identify areas for improvement and set a plan in motion. Whether it is broadening your practice/experience, strengthening your advocacy, or enhancing your professional visibility, take proactive steps towards making yourself an even stronger candidate for the next attempt.
Reapplying: because stubbornness is a virtue. Once the initial sting subsides, reapply. This seems obvious, but many barristers allow rejection to dissuade them from ever applying again. This is a mistake. The statistics alone dictate that persistence pays off. Those who succeed are, more often than not, those who simply refused to stop trying.
Surround yourself with a supportive network. Speak to those who have been through it. Seek mentors who can provide both practical and psychological support. The legal profession, for all its stiff upper lips, contains many who are willing to share their own experiences, if only asked.
Above all, maintain the long view. A setback today is not the end of the road. It is merely a diversion, perhaps even a necessary one. The profession is replete with examples of barristers who faced repeated rejections before ultimately achieving their goals. If anything, these individuals emerge stronger, more resilient, and better prepared for the responsibilities that await them.
Rejection is unpleasant, but it is also inevitable. The legal profession, for all its prestige, is not immune to the fundamental realities of human endeavour. Setbacks are not failures; they are merely stepping stones to eventual success.
When faced with the rejection of a role, it is worth remembering the Law of Conservation of Energy – the principle that energy cannot be destroyed, only transformed. Instead of allowing disappointment or frustration to consume us, we should redirect that excess energy into something constructive. Just as Albert Einstein demonstrated that mass and energy are interchangeable, so too can we convert the emotional energy of rejection into professional growth, social engagement, or personal development. Channel that energy into refining your skills, expanding your network, or even pursuing a long-neglected passion. Whether it is enhancing your practice, contributing to a cause, or strengthening personal relationships, the key is not to let rejection deplete you but to let it propel you forward. Or even write an article about it to show others they are not alone!
So, the next time an email arrives bearing less-than-ideal news, take a deep breath, allow yourself a moment of irritation (or an entire evening with a stiff drink) and then remember rejection is not the end. It is merely another chapter in the long, often frustrating, but ultimately rewarding story of a career at the Bar.
I end with saying if it were easy, everyone would be doing it, and if that’s the case it wouldn’t be worth doing in the first place.
Sources of support
The Bar Council offers a mentoring scheme to those interested in silk or judicial appointments.
The Mental Health & Wellbeing at the Bar website is full of useful resources and sources of support for barristers’ psychological health . There is also a 24/7 confidential helpline (tel: 0800 169 2040) for self-employed barristers with a practising certificate as well as members of the IBC and LPMA.
LawCare offers peer-to-peer support for anyone in or associated with the legal community. Call: 0800 279 6888 (Mon to Fri, 9am to 5pm except bank holidays).
The Samaritans can be contacted 24 hours a day, 365 days a year on tel: 116 123, or email: jo@samaritans.org.
International helplines can be found at: befrienders.org.
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